Blended Families Are Hard Work But Well Worth It!

        Hey everyone! This week I want to talk a bit about blended families. I think this topic is really important knowledge. A lot of people that don’t come from blended families do not understand how it is to be in a blended family. I know that there are quite a few different ways that blended families come about and that some of them are really hard on all those that are involved. So I just wanted to talk about a few things that may really help you whether you are going to be marrying into or are already part of a blended family.

        The first and foremost thing I want to bring up is that if you are marrying or married to someone that has children or you are the one with children then you and your spouse or soon to be spouse need to be accepting. I'll say it one more time. You need to be accepting of those that are involved because it is not just two people that are involved. The second thing is you need to be understanding. You need to understand that when there are children involved that it will be harder and more challenging then a marriage without children involved. You will have to accept and understand that it will be about 2 years before things will settle down and have any sense of normality. That may seem like a long time but the reason is because it takes that long for us to acclimate to the differences of how we used to do things to how we will need to do things now and in the future. Some things can be acclimated to pretty fast while other things like events that happen only once a year will take a couple years for you and your spouse to figure out what will be the norm for those events from now on.

        The third thing I would like to bring up may be harder for some but will definitely help. It is that the birth parent must do all the heavy disciplining. If their step parent does the heavy disciplining then the children may feel wronged or that their step parent doesn’t have the right and that they are overstepping their boundaries. The fourth is that the step parent should be like that really cool aunt or uncle. I am not talking about the aunt or uncle that will let you do anything you want but the aunt or uncle that you look up to, respect, and are really friendly. Be someone that they want to share their problems with and will come to you when they need help. But remember that if they tell you something that makes you concerned then discuss it with your spouse (the birth parent). And that brings us to the last but definitely not the least and that is communication. When you are a parent of a blended family then you will have to talk to your spouse about your children everyday. Communication is super important! I feel like I mention communication in pretty much every blog I have written but that is because I believe that communication is that important. If communication is that important in a non-blended family then it is twice as important in a blended family. Discussions behind closed doors(in private) about the children and how the family is doing is something that will save so much heartache. This is so that both are on the same page about how they are going to go about raising their children and it will also bring comfort to the birth parent that the non-birth parent is respecting their kids and not overstepping their bounds.

        Thanks for sticking with me till the end and this far along. Have a wonderful week and I truly hope that this will help you to become closer to your family. If you have any questions or comments please leave a comment and I will see what I can do to help you out.